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| Snowy graduation, January 2013 avec dad. |
Bit of a different post today. But I thought I'd talk about the reason I decided to overhaul my blog and why in the original post I'd mentioned making a decision and documenting my life for at least the next year or so.
In the summer I had somewhat of an epiphany. I turned twenty three in July and I had a bit of a snap, shall we say? I made quite a few decisions. I decided to save up over the summer and get a good wedge of money together so I could start learning to drive. In the past, it never really mattered to me, but I know a lot of jobs would require a driving license. Most of my friends drive too, and I don't half feel guilty not being able to offer to drive when we go on day trips to Alton Towers, the seaside or even other cities for shopping trips.
I also decided, only two years after leaving university and just four months after completing my NCTJ diploma that I was considering going back to university to study for a degree in what fifteen year old Laura had originally intended to do.
At school, and I'll never forget this, I had a million and one ideas for a career. At primary school, and after seeing Disney on Ice for several years running, I wanted to be a professional ice skater. I went through all the usual phases of wanting to be a vet or work with animals. The fact that I'm really squeamish and scared of dogs ended up throwing those ideas out. In secondary school I was hell bent on being a beauty therapist or a hairdresser, so much so, that I even dragged my dad along to an open evening at one of the colleges that did those courses. It was only when speaking to one of my pals at the time, I learned about A levels and after many choice words and arguments with my mum, I decided to leave my options a bit more open and pursue those.
It was at the last minute that I stupidly changed everything. At school, we were given application forms where we listed which subjects we wanted to study then had to write a small statement as to why we'd chosen them. I'll never forget writing 'I have chosen to study biology, as I want to go to university and study physiotherapy'. I'd also chucked around occupational therapy and radiography with my mum at home, but at that time nothing was set in stone and I wasn't totally clued up on any of those subjects. It was the idea of having a good career, getting to work in a hospital without the potential gore factor that was appealing, because let's face it, I wouldn't do well in an operating theatre. But a few weeks before I was due to start college, already having had to drop one AS level due to my predicted grades not being good enough, I called them and dropped biology, opting to do graphic design instead.
Biggest mistake ever.
I changed my mind because the biology teacher we had in year eleven was anything but inspiring, he was rubbish and he didn't make me want to continue with the subject. I had started to find it hard and messed around in class instead of listening. Despite that, I still walked out of double award science with two B grades.
I coasted through college, despising every second and planning the great escape to uni. I pulled creative writing out of my arse at the very last minute, bullshitted a personal statement and got my place at the University of Derby. I'd be lying if I said 'what if' wasn't in the back of my mind, especially during the times I hated creative writing. At the end of second year I knew my heart wasn't in it anymore, but I finished the degree with a 2.2 classification and walked straight into the world of retail.
At fifteen/sixteen I thought that after university, I'd know what I wanted to do with my life. I chose creative writing because I've always written stories from being a child, I've filled endless notebooks with tales about girls my age and animals, and then we were given the task during an A Level English class to write a story with suspense build up. Our teacher read mine out to the class without revealing who wrote the story beforehand and everyone was amazed that little old me was capable of writing such a story. But after finishing uni, all I wanted to do was
never write fiction ever again. So I gave up. I looked into journalism and found out a college in Sheffield did an NCTJ course, which they advertised was a sure fire way into the journalism industry.
One particularly bad month later, I had applied and had an interview. Just after we'd started the course I knew in my gut something wasn't right. But I was talked into staying on the course, and having paid almost two thousand pounds I wasn't sure I'd even be refunded, I'd finished the course with relatively good grades.
What I'd failed to realise is journalism, like creative writing, is difficult to forge a career in. 'What if' was constantly clouding my vision and I was going down the route of self loathing because I'd failed myself. I'd steered myself in the wrong direction and hated myself for it. Unfortunately, I can't build a time machine and change all the mistakes I've made in regards to my education path, but I can do a u-turn and put it right.
In the summer, I started looking at apply to university to study for a degree in either physiotherapy or occupational therapy. I'm currently leaning more towards the latter. I've been to an open day at the University of Huddersfield and had a positive chat with the head of OT there. She gave me plenty of advice on how to make my application stand out and where to find voluntary experience.
So, here we go again. University round two. I feel like I'm going backwards a little bit, but it's the only way to move forwards. I won't actually be going until 2016, and that means I won't graduate until I'm 28, which makes me feel a bit sick. But it's a chance to reset my life and forge a career for myself that I'll enjoy. It's a scary prospect going back to uni, as I didn't have a fantastic time the first time around, but hopefully I can learn from those mistakes and do a better job this time.
